August 21, 2015

Love and Haight

Last week, my BFF got laid off from her job without warning.  Today, she wanted to know who sent her this in the mail:

"You lazy bum!" 
-A pantsless 35 year old woman typing this in the dark because it's too much work to reach over and turn on the light.  

I'm a bit insulted that after twenty-one years, she can't tell my handiwork. 

It's a Katt-Throat World...

“All I ask is one thing, and I’m asking this particularly of young people:  please don’t be cynical.  I hate cynicism.  For the record, it’s my least favorite quality, and it doesn’t lead anywhere.  Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. 

But, if you work really hard, and you’re kind, amazing things will happen.” 

― Conan O'Brien

This is one of those quotes that went beyond an inspirational platitude to the career advice I needed.  There is a business side of me, where I know that, like, 90% of my work is going to be "networking".  I can't use people though- I care about them too much.  It's just my nature.  Like, I would rather cut my own throat than be "cut throat".
It's always been my dream to go on Conan, ask to borrow a shirt, then giggle at how long it is on me.

Picking Friends

This is the present I got for my 8 year old nephew last Christmas.  By the time I was his age, I had read several of my peers diaries.

I apologize.  Also, you're fucking boring.  That's probably why we aren't friends anymore.  

Because every eight year old boy needs to know what I'm doing in the bathroom at 4pm.