Showing posts from July 10, 2015


As a Mother's Day present, I put a profile up for a month on Tinder.  For those of you new to the thirty-five year old boundary war between me and my mother (hi mom!  I love you!), here is an excerpt from my very first post on this site from six years ago, titled " Ten Minutes of Conversation with Mom on the Patio While Trying to Write ". * Me :  Why do you assume I'll never find love? Mom :  I think you should-that's the point!  I think a guy should love you and see how wonderful you are!  Get the damn dog off me. * That was back when I was just a naive, twenty-nine year old kid.  I had my whole life ahead of me.   Me at 29.  Just a whippersnapper, full of dreams.   Now I'm a washed up thirty-five year old hag with dusty ovaries and saggy boobies.  Sometimes if I shake my head really fast, I can see jowls.   Me currently.  Yuck!  Ridden hard and put away wet.     I cannot stress enough how much I hate dating.  The last dat