Sore and Tinder

I scoured through hundreds of men on Tinder and hand selected a few for dates.  Despite many of their profiles saying otherwise, all of them made it very clear that they weren't interested in a relationship... which was completely unnecessary, especially for the ones who told me this in my living room.  Here is the view from my futon:

The icon with Christ dead, being lowered into the tomb, is called "Extreme Humility". 

The rest of my place is covered in books about Holy Tradition.  They don't understand that I can't date just any pagan weirdo.  

There's an assumption that I want a relationship, which isn't exactly wrong, but somehow I don't get to vote on the partner.  

So thank you, all of you, for the very kind but completely unnecessary "I'm not looking for..." speeches.