Katt Serious: A Brief History of My Junkie Butt
(*My Twitter is @kattfunny if you're interested.)
|CAUTION! This is what a drug addict looks like!|
My real name is Kathleen Adams. I was raised in the West Hills of Portland, Oregon, an area which is referenced in the Everclear song "I Will Buy You a New Life".
|Jesuit High School|
Class of '98
I went to a Catholic, college prep school, then did most of my university in Germany, where I studied a bunch of languages. Currently, I have learned (to a degree of proficiency) French, German, Danish, and Norwegian.
|Sophomore year of college. 1999. |
I once had to waste five minutes convincing a Swede that I'm not Swedish. I don't even speak Swedish.
|Junior year of college. 2000. |
I smoked so much that one of the German class' grammar questions was
"Kat raucht gerne weil, _____."
(translation: Kat likes to smoke because _______.)
|Andrew John Barna|
03/29/79 - 01/09/05
In order to tolerate the pain, I spent the following years mainlining heroin and cocaine until I was the lowest scum of society- a smelly, fat junkie who wound up in the homeless person detox.
|Me smacked out at 23. I got fat on heroin I never lost my appetite, and it shut down my metabolism.|
I've been sober since January 3rd, 2007.
|January 3rd, 2010 on my third sobriety anniversary.|
I cleaned up, wrote about my life, and to my shock, people wanted to read about it. They told me that I was talented, and best of all, that I had helped them understand addiction.
I had assumed the only career paths suitable for me were motherhood or monasticism due to my unique, lifelong affinity for mankind and God. I'm wrong though because I have served both best simply by being me writing about me.
Note the blazer.
|"The Face of Heroin"|
Sigh...brutal (shaking head), just brutal.
That isn't a reason not to talk about it though. I have to because the others don't get to. Where I wound up, almost no one survives, and those who do don't look like me. I was able to get out at twenty-six, right before I wound up dead at twenty-seven or on a "Faces of Meth" poster at thirty.
That's all for now. I love you. Bye bye.
|Take that heroin!|
(...and cocaine, alcohol, cigarettes, tanning beds...)